"No!" Koyuki protested as she started waving her toys around, "C'mon Onii-chan! I wanna play and talk and do all the fun things we haven't done in awhile! I wanna spend all night playing!"
Naruto felt himself go pale as he started regretting not taking Erza's offer to sleep. He chuckled, "Y-yay."
########Hunter########
"God you smell like rotten meat."
"I bet your dick is permanently shriveled, ain't it?"
"What's that I smell? You been swimming through hot garbage again you dumb bastard?"
"I told you that was one time and it was for a job!"
"They just don't stop, do they?" Lucy tiredly groaned as she watched the Dragon-Slayer and Maker Mage argue between each other in the middle of the train platform.
"Nope. This is basically their whole life." Happy replied cheerfully before looking up at the blonde girl, "By the way, what are you doing here?"
"Mira-San asked me to tag along. She said that she wanted me to make sure that Natsu and Gray got along and listened to Erza-San's orders without causing too much ruckus." She sent a little scowl at the cat, "She also said that you and Naruto-San deliberately 'add gas to the flame' when no one is looking."
"How would I add gas to a flame?" Happy tilted his head innocently, "I'm just a cat."
"You're evil incarnate."
"Good, I'm glad you came early."
Everyone turned to the voice and had varying expressions at the sight. For one, Erza was carrying enough luggage that it almost seemed like she was carrying a traveling circus. And right besides her was the whiskered blond man that looked like a corpse had stood up and started walking around.
Natsu and Gray looked at the sleep deprived blond man, "Geez, you look like hell frozen over. You gonna be all right?"
Naruto rubbed his eyes and nodded his head, "Yeah, I spent most of the night playing with Koyuki and I lost track of time. I'm glad Erza isn't the gloating type or else I'd never hear the end of it." He yawned before looking at the two men, "I'll try to take a nap on the train so make sure you two listen to what Erza tells you. It's important."
"Pfft, whatever." Natsu slammed his fist into his hand, "Whatever this job is that you and Erza can't handle, I'll take it on all by myself! That's why you brought me here!"
"Hey, dumbass, I think you're misunderstanding something!" Gray grabbed Natsu's shoulder and pulled him back as he glared, "They brought me to clean up this mess! You're only here for comic relief!"
"What was that you bastard?!"
"What, you're deaf now too?!"
Before their staring contest could get any more violent, two hands inserted themselves between their faces and pushed them far apart. Naruto looked between them in annoyance, "Okay, enough with the pissing contest! If we're on the train and you two wake me up with you're goddamn fighting, I swear I'm gonna send you both home in a gurney! Got it!"
Natsu and Gray furrowed their eyes for a second before they looked off to the side and grumbled. Naruto usually didn't force them to do stuff the same way as Erza did when she made a demand, but they knew what he was like when he was cranky or angry. If he made a threat like that then there was a good chance he'd follow up on it.
Erza looked at the three men grumble between each other and hummed, "I guess I won't have to check on them after all."
Happy flew up and saluted next to her, "They aren't worth your time, ma'am!"
The armor Mage saw the exasperated blonde girl look at the scene with comical confusion before she faced her, "I saw you yesterday in the guild hall. You were talking to Mira, weren't you?"
Lucy realized she was being addressed and shook herself out of her thoughts. She bowed towards the red-head, "Yes, I'm a new member and Mira-San asked me to come along. I'm Lucy Heartfilia. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Erza-San."
"Oh, you can just call me Erza. And I've heard a lot about you." She looked over her shoulder, "Naruto! Come meet the new member of our guild! She'll be joining us on the job today!"
Naruto walked over and looked the blonde girl over as she shrunk under his intense gaze. He nodded and cupped his chin, "Oh yes, Koyuki told us all about you. How you destroyed Hargeon port, and brought a politician's mansion crumbling to the ground, and how you defeated a fifteen-foot gorilla all by yourself." Naruto nodded with an impressed look on his face, "That's pretty awesome."
"W-what?!" Lucy shook her head and waved her arms, "I-I didn't do any of that! It wasn't me!" She looked to Gray, Natsu, and Happy for help, "Tell them!"
"Wow, and I thought you were the normal one of the bunch." Gray said while looking at the girl like she was a monster.
"When did you do all of this?! You said you didn't take jobs before coming to the guild!" Natsu yelled while actually impressed with Lucy's supposed achievements, kinda wanting to fight her and see for himself.
"She's a freak!" Happy added in a cheerful tone.
Lucy just leaned against the wall, her whole body stark white and tears coming down her eyes, "The lies...they cut so deep...and they destroy my reputation..."
"Well I hope I can see some of this while we are on the job." Erza then turned towards the train, "Come along everyone, it's time to-"
"Wait, Erza!" Natsu yelled, getting all of their attention as he faced the red-head, "Yesterday, you said you felt bad asking us to take this job without being able to return the favor. Well, I know a way you can make it up to me."
He tightened his fist and engulfed it in flame, "When we get back, you and I are gonna fight. No holding back."
Gray, Lucy, and Happy all looked at the lovable moron like he had taken a dive off a building and landed straight on his head. Naruto raised his brow before smiling, interested in seeing Natsu try to take on Erza after all the other beatings he's received over the years. And Erza just blinked in mild surprise before she smiled, "Well, it has been quite some time since we last fought. Are you sure all you want is a fight with me?"
"Damn straight I'm sure! I'll fight you!" He pointed at Naruto, "Then Naruto!" At Gray, "Then this Dumbass!" And finally at Lucy, "And I can settle things with Lucy too!"
Lucy cried in fear, "Why me?! I'm not strong?! All those stories were about you Natsu, not me! They're lies! Lies I tell you!"
"Don't try to save yourself the beating!"
"NOOOOOOOOOO!"
Erza smiled and nodded, "All right Natsu, I accept your challenge."
"ALL RIGHT!" Natsu exclaimed while his entire body burst into scorching hot flames.
Gray just shook his head while Naruto laughed, "Great! I can already see the bloodshed happening!"
"What was that?!" Natsu jumped over to the laughing blond and grabbed his collar, "I'm not like I was before Naruto! I'm stronger, tougher, all around better! Just you wait! When we get back, you're gonna see a brand new-"
########Hunter########
"HGUUUUUUUUU!" Natsu loudly groaned as he suffered through the terrible fate of motion sickness. For Natsu, there was no worse torture in the world than sitting in a vehicle going at a brisk pace down a set of tracks.
Gray shook his head in dissapointment, "And you were talking all that hot shit earlier." The girls watched as Natsu couldn't hold himself up any longer and leaned against Gray's shoulder before being instantly pushed back. And then fell again. And back. And again. Gray grew angry at the routine, "Okay, enough of this!" He looked over to the women and blue cat sitting across from him, "Either of you wanna switch?"
Lucy shook her head, "No, I'm good over here."
"The answer isn't for us to switch seats. It's to help him relax." Erza said calmly as she stood up and held onto Natsu's shoulder gently while he quietly groaned. Before she dug her fist so deep into his gut that he was almost lifted out of his seat. The others watched in horror as Natsu let out one last dying groan before he passed out with tears coming down his face. She then grabbed the rolled up sleeping bag off his pack and placed it against his unconscious head to rest against the window. She sat back down and fixed her hair before looking to the rest of them, "See. It's that simple."
"Wailing on the unconscious guy to make him shut up." Happy raised his paw, "That's Erza for ya!"
Lucy and Gray just glared down at the little brown-nosing cat. Lucy grumbled, "Stupid suck-up."
Gray added, "Kiss-ass." He scratched his head before looking at the S-Class Mage, "Erza, is this such a good idea? I mean with the lump of flesh right here and...that..." They all looked at the seat across from them where Naruto was sprawled out over the seat, blissfully napping and snoring loudly, "Our man power has sorta been halved. Are we gonna be all right?"
"We'll be fine Gray, stop worrying. Take a moment to relax." Erza turned and faced Lucy directly and gave her a small smile, "So you've been in the guild for a week now, correct? How are you finding it?"
Lucy almost didn't hear Erza because she was so distracted by the blue and brown color of her eyes that she could only notice now by sitting so close to the older girl. Lucy came back to her senses, "Oh, well...I'll admit, everybody is...kinda weird."
Gray raised an eyebrow, "How am I weird?"
"Where's your shirt?"
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